Holiday Drabbles
by vicodin-vixens
Summary: A series of holiday related House/Wilson drabbles. Okay, not 'true' drabbles, but drabblish nonetheless. Warnings: Slash We own nothing but some curly-toed shoes and Christmas balls, a hippopotamus and Dominick the Donkey.
1. Tree Trimming

"I'm glad you're here," Wilson said, as he struggled into the house, his arms laden with boxes.

House looked up from the television as Wilson gingerly set the boxes on the floor and exited again, only to return again dragging an enormous Christmas tree behind him.

"It's our first Christmas in our new house, I thought we should decorate," Wilson explained, as he set the tree upright and secured it in position.

House rummaged through the boxes, pulling out package after package of brightly coloured tinsel.

"Was there a two-for-one sale?" he asked.

Wilson shrugged and began stringing the lights, "I've never decorated a tree before. I wasn't sure how much we would need. Get off your ass and help me out."

Grudgingly, House limped over to the tree and snatched a box of ornaments out of Wilson's hands. He wrinkled his nose as he pulled out a tacky snowman ornament.

He set the rest of the ornaments down on the couch and took the snowman to the kitchen. A few minutes later he hung the ornament at Wilson's eye-level.

House had drawn in thick eyebrows and given the snowman a tie.  
"I'm going to call this one Jimmy." He said with a smile.

"Perfect," said Wilson, hanging another snowman beside that one, "This one is Greg." Wilson smiled as he selected a candy cane and hung it with the snowman.

"Haha." House said dryly.

A few minutes later, Wilson stopped with a snowflake ornament in his hand as he listened to House singing 'Silver Bells' under his breath.

"Are you...._singing_?" Wilson asked in disbelief.

House's blue eyes flashed dangerously as he regarded Wilson, "Shut up or I'll show you how the angel feels with that tree shoved up it's ass."


	2. Wilson's Letter To Santa Claus

Dear Santa,

I've never asked for anything before.

Okay, well, I often ask for help for my patients (a cure for cancer would sure be great!) especially the children but that's different.

This time I'm asking for something for myself. Something I want for me and me alone.

All I want for Christmas is House.

Not _a_ house. _The_ House. Greg House.

Now I know you must think I'm a little (okay, a lot) too old to be believing in Santa Claus, not to mention the fact that I'm Jewish, but it _is_ Christmas-time and from everything I've heard, it's the time to believe in miracles.

Besides, I've tried everything else, so you're essentially my last hope. No pressure, though.

I've gotten married (and divorced) twice since I've known House, in the hopes that he would realize he wanted what he couldn't have.

I spent four (long) months dating a woman who was as similar to House as possible without having a dick, hoping he would figure out I was secretly in love with him.

People might think he's a genius, but when it comes to this, he's an idiot.

But just think how great he would look under the tree on Christmas morning! I can't decide if you should leave him unwrapped or whether I would rather do the unwrapping myself. Either way is fine with me, Santa.

Oh, by the way, I wasn't sure which kind of cookies you preferred, so I've left a few different choices (chocolate chip, cranberry-walnut and shortbread). If the plate is empty, it's because House ate them. Sorry about that. Don't worry though, I put some in the bottom drawer of the fridge, underneath the vegetables- House will never think to look there.

Yours Very Truly,  
James E. Wilson

PS If you could manage it, and it's not too much to ask, I'd also really like a set of Le Creuset cookware.

PS#2 How _do _reindeer fly?


	3. The 12 Days of Christmas

**A/N: We were tempted to do an audio version, but in keeping with the season of giving, we give you the gift of undamaged ears. You're welcome.**

On the first day of Christmas, my true love gave to me, a day off of clinic duty.

On the second day of Christmas, my true love gave to me, two pairs of sneakers, and a day off of clinic duty.

On the third day of Christmas, my true love gave to me, three differentials, two pairs of sneakers and a day off of clinic duty.

On the fourth day of Christmas, my true love gave to me, four Magic-8 Balls, three differentials, two pairs of sneakers and a day off of clinic duty.

On the fifth day of Christmas, my true love gave to me, five Vi-co-din, four Magic-8 Balls, three differentials, two pairs of sneakers and a day off of clinic duty.

On the sixth day of Christmas, my true love gave to me, six low-cut blouses, five Vi-co-din, four Magic-8 Balls, three differentials, two pairs of sneakers and a day off of clinic duty.

On the seventh day of Christmas, my true love gave to me, seven stolen lunches, six low-cut blouses, five Vi-co-din, four Magic-8 Balls, three differentials, two pairs of sneakers and a day off of clinic duty.

On the eighth day of Christmas, my true love gave to me, eight white board markers, seven stolen lunches, six low-cut blouses, five Vi-co-din, four Magic-8 Balls, three differentials, two pairs of sneakers and a day off of clinic duty.

On the ninth day of Christmas, my true love gave to me, nine lying patients, eight white board markers, seven stolen lunches, six low-cut blouses, five Vi-co-din, four Magic-8 Balls, three differentials, two pairs of sneakers and a day off of clinic duty.

On the tenth day of Christmas, my true love gave to me, ten hallucinations, nine lying patients, eight white board markers, seven stolen lunches, six low-cut blouses, five Vi-co-din, four Magic-8 Balls, three differentials, two pairs of sneakers and a day off of clinic duty.

On the eleventh day of Christmas, my true love gave to me, eleven break and enters, ten hallucinations, nine lying patients, eight white board markers, seven stolen lunches, six low-cut blouses, five Vi-co-din, four Magic-8 Balls, three differentials, two pairs of sneakers and a day off of clinic duty.

On the twelfth day of Christmas, my true love gave to me, twelve nights with Wilson, eleven break and enters, ten hallucinations, nine lying patients, eight white board markers, seven stolen lunches, six low-cut blouses, five Vi-co-din, four Magic 8-Balls, three differentials, two pairs of sneakers, and a day off of clinic duty.


	4. 12 Days Wilson Style

On the first day of Christmas, my true love gave to me, a cripple called Gregory.

On the second day of Christmas, my true love gave to me, two hands on hips, and a cripple called Gregory.

On the third day of Christmas, my true love gave to me, three wedding rings, two hands on hips and a cripple called Gregory.

On the fourth day of Christmas, my true love gave to me, four Italian loafers, three wedding rings, two hands on hips and a cripple called Gregory.

On the fifth day of Christmas, my true love gave to me, five ugly ties, four Italian loafers, three wedding rings, two hands on hips and a cripple called Gregory.

On the sixth day of Christmas, my true love gave to me, six cooking classes, five ugly ties, four Italian loafers, three wedding rings, two hands on hips and a cripple called Gregory.

On the seventh day of Christmas, my true love gave to me, seven kids remissions, six cooking classes, five ugly ties, four Italian loafers, three wedding rings, two hands on hips and a cripple called Gregory.

On the eighth day of Christmas, my true love gave to me, eight dates with patients, seven kids remissions, six cooking classes, five ugly ties, four Italian loafers, three wedding rings, two hands on hips and a cripple called Gregory.

On the ninth day of Christmas, my true love gave to me, nine eyebrow waxes, eight dates with patients, seven kids remissions, six cooking classes, five ugly ties, four Italian loafers, three wedding rings, two hands on hips and a cripple called Gregory.

On the tenth day of Christmas, my true love gave to me, ten fluted cake pans, nine eyebrow waxes, eight dates with patients, seven kids remissions, six cooking classes, five ugly ties, four Italian loafers, three wedding rings, two hands on hips and a cripple called Gregory.

On the eleventh day of Christmas, my true love gave to me, eleven blow-dried hairdos, ten fluted cake pans, nine eyebrow waxes, eight dates with patients, seven kids remissions, six cooking classes, five ugly ties, four Italian loafers, three wedding rings, two hands on hips and a cripple called Gregory.

On the twelfth day of Christmas, my true love gave to me, twelve doped up coffees, eleven blow-dried hairdos, ten fluted cake pans, nine eyebrow waxes, eight dates with patients, seven kids remissions, six cooking classes, five ugly ties, four Italian loafers, three wedding rings, two hands on hips and a cripple called Gregory.


End file.
